Friday, August 15, 2008

Tooth Fairy Fired Due to Budget Cuts

Friday’s confession…

I’m a little on the frugal side. I like to save money. I look for bargains or inexpensive brands… oh hell, I’m cheap! So, when my son woke up the other morning and told me that the tooth fairy left him $4 I knew he must’ve counted incorrectly.

Four dollars? WTF? That’s a gallon of gas.

Don’t get me wrong. My children are priceless, but come on, it’s a tooth. And it’s not in his mouth anymore.

So I had a little chat with the tooth fairy who thought that was a fair amount for the type of tooth that it was and it’s position in the mouth. Again, WTF? Clearly the tooth fairy is not in charge of the budget at Wifey’s House.

Is it just me or is $4 a lot? I remember getting change for my teeth. I know that was 30 years ago, ahem, but still. Please let me know if you think I should fire the tooth fairy or if I need to get second job to pay for all these teeth.

Winks & Smiles,


MoziEsmé said...

Inflation, inflation! I say the Tooth Fairy rate is $5 IF it is a clean tooth with no cavities. You've gotta at least be able to buy a pack of sugar free gum with the money.

But a lot of moms I know say $0.50

Wifey said...

$5. Wait I just had a heart attack. OK, I'm back. I like the clean, no cavaties incentive - too funny! I guess I was thinking somewhere in the middle, like $2. Maybe $3 for a front tooth. Smiles!

Lu said...

$4! Can I have your tooth fairy? The most mine have ever gotten is $1.

Monkey Toe Momma said...

Ha HA! That's hilarious! I fired the Tooth Fairy, too. He gave our girls a 5 spot. No WAY was that going to work. Our NEW tooth fairy is far more clever, IMO. SHE gives our kids golden Presidential Dollars. They're extra special, don'tcha know. And, they're only a dollar. Goes to show, presentation is everything. ;)

ML said...

Tooth Fairy always brought me and my two sisters silver dollars and I thought that would be a cool tradition. Especially when we found, while cleaning out my mother's garage, the 7 silver dollars that had rotated through. Most were wiped clean with acetone, but on a few remain - "indelibly marked" with fine point Sharpie - M---'s 6th lost tooth, 7/13/80, etc...With the price of silver these days (and her not keeping up on her strength training) the Tooth Fairy now brings 2 dollar bills. But she still marks them with kid's name, date lost and which tooth.

Damselfly said...

Twenty baby teeth times $4 or $5 -- help!!!

heather said...

We are about to lose our first tooth and I have been interviewing my girls on what they leave. It is such a range from $1-$5. And that's just for the baby tooth! What's the price for a molar then?! Because the tooth fairy always paid double for them!! I need a loan for 4 kids!

Julia said...

I only got one dollar for every tooth I lost and this was not too long ago. Kids these days have it made!

Tracee said...

$1 sister - except for that one time I got suckered into leaving a toy poodle. but, I put a stop to that right quick.

TerriRainer said...

See, I pay MORE (about $4) for molars than the front teeth(about $2)...SIZE REALLY DOES MATTER!

:) Terri

Becoming Me said...

Definitely fire that fairy. A buck is enough

White Hot Magik said...

Okay I know I am way behind and playing catch up here. The tooth fairy has been leaving my son $1.00.

Sheri said...

You think YOU'RE cheap? The tooth fairy says you've got NUTHIN' on her, babe!

She's been handing out the same miserly rate since before you were born: lousy QUARTERS! And she's not going to change her practice any time soon!

Okay, here's the deal: she says it's a logistics issue. She flies around all night, working her tail off, and she only has room for ONE mode of payment. Thus, the quarter. Yeah, dime's are smaller, but she's got a thing for Washington. (Says she met him once on a dark and snormy night....GET YOUR MIND OUT OF THE GUTTER!!!).

Anyway, she knows pesky parents are swiping the quarters and giving more. She wants them to know one thing: that she's "sick and tired of them moving in on her domain!"

Yeah, she's a bit prickly. Especially when the moon is high and the shadows deep. Good thing she has her firefly pals to keep her company.


Sheri Bell-Rehwoldt
Author, You Think It's Easy Being the Tooth Fairy?
12,000 copies sold!